6 Slacker Behaviors that Science Says are Good for You: #2

#2: WASTING TIME ON THE INTERNET MAY PREVENT DEMENTIA
It only seems logical that spending hours upon hours surfing the abyss of the Internet will eventually destroy your brain. Five minutes of reading YouTube comments alone should probably wipe out your capacity to do long division without a calculator.

The logic behind this assumption seems sound; it's like when you watch trashy television, right? Your brain is less engaged than if you were, say, reading a book or doing a crossword puzzle. And because you're not exercising your brain muscles, they must be atrophying.

Actually, no. Because some science guys are beginning to find out that those hours of surfing the interwebs might actually be making us smarter.

So How is This Helpful?

According to this UCLA study using Google (or any other search engine) can stimulate your brain more than reading a book. To be fair, the experiment was conducted on older people, and these guys weren't exactly using the Internet to find horse porn. They were probably researching the best plum juice. Nonetheless, the findings were significant enough that researchers declared that regular Googling can fight off dementia.

Fight that brain deterioration, Pop-Pop!

Don't get us wrong about Google. They're obviously the next great supervillains, the likes of which we've never seen, and will never see again, because they're definitely going to become the masters of the planet and subjugate the rest of us to death. It's not Google itself that's magically healing old people noggins. It's the rapid exposure to new information that's doing the trick. Surfing the Internet stimulates the brain and increases neuron activity. So basically, by visiting various sites you find unexpected information that fires up your brain, preventing it from rusting down.

(cracked.com)

6 Slacker Behaviors that Science Says are Good for You: #3

#3: SLEEPING IN IS GOOD FOR YOUR HEALTH
Your whole life you've been told the early bird gets the worm, which is totally true, if that worm happens to be a metaphor for death. Because contrary to what your parents, grandparents, teachers, coaches and ridiculously motivated roommates have told you, sleeping later is better for you than hopping out of bed at the crack of daylight.

So How is This Helpful?

While it's true that too much sleep can be bad for you, it's worse to not get enough. There's a reason you feel like shit at the moment you crawl out of bed to kill your alarm clock. You're killing yourself.

Studies show that people who only sleep six or less hours a night have a 70 percent higher risk of dying younger. Part of the reason for this is that less sleep means more stress, worse driving and significant weight gain. Humans need at least eight hours of sleep in order to produce hormones that regulate the appetite, and to heal from workouts. And it goes without saying that the less sleep you get, the less focused and alert you are, which means the more likely you are to do something stupid, like causing the Exxon Valdez oil spill. In the end, waking up at an ungodly hour to take a jog might actually be worse for your body than sleeping in.

You're killing yourself with jogs!

Oh, and after you finally roll out of bed, don't bother making it. There are these little buggers called dust mites, insects that live inside your mattress and sheets, and they can cause asthma and trigger allergies. A recent British study discovered that an unmade bed is a much harsher environment for the critters, effectively killing them off.

More proof that your mom was secretly trying to kill you.

Apparently, when you make your bed in the morning, you kind of seal the little guys in, keeping them warm and cozy-like. So college students around the world can rejoice that their slovenly lairs are actually fighting the good fight against asthma. Still no word on the benefits of leaving your three-day-old underwear on the floor, though.

(cracked.com)

6 Slacker Behaviors that Science Says are Good for You: #4

#4: SKIPPING OUT ON COLLEGE CAN MAKE YOU HAPPIER

Back in the day, college was all about toga parties and binge drinking until your liver burst into flame. Nowadays, it's more about all-nighters hopped up on Ritalin so your GPA can justify spending 40 grand a year. But all those exhausting classes, internships and research projects have to count for something, right? According to researchers: They do. All that effort adds up to a depressed and miserable life.

Meanwhile, skipping out on all that misery might just help you live longer than those Einsteins who don't.


So How is This Helpful?

The Curtin Institute of Technology discovered that the more education you have, the more you're at risk of becoming disillusioned with life. Sinking into a soul-crushing depression is just one of the ultra-fun side effects of higher education, along with a more stressful lifestyle and unmanageable financial debt. Higher education is pretty much like Christmas Day if you expect to get a pony, but instead you discover you're trapped in a Dilbert cartoon, and also there is no pony. Only thousands of dollars of debt in a pony shaped stocking.

(cracked.com)

6 Slacker Behaviors that Science Says are Good for You- #5

#5: BEING FAT MIGHT HELP YOU LIVE LONGER

When people say that some fat can help you live longer, they're not talking about being obese here. Obesity is still worse for your health than trying to ride a bear that is riding shark. But...

In a rather morbid study, Canadian researchers observed thousands of people for 12 years, carefully noting when they kicked the bucket. Not surprisingly, the super obese subjects died first, proving once and for all that all the video games where you gain more health as you eat more are not scientifically accurate. However, people at what was considered a healthy weight tended to die second, leaving the not-exactly-svelte to laugh as they slurped a milkshake. Then the milkshake came out of their noses, and that made everyone laugh.

So How is This Helpful?

The most likely reason for the chubbies living longer is stress tolerance. Their bodies have fat reserves they can use while sick or under stress; skinny bodies don't. In other words, being an underfed, stressed out Calvin Klein underwear model is a lot more dangerous for you than lounging on the couch all day.

So fat can make you last longer under stress, but it's not like a big booty can actually save your life, right? Wrong. A study in England discovered that having fat on your back and thighs helps your body produce beneficial hormones that lower the risk of diabetes and heart disease.

Even more interesting is what happened to the patients who decided to lose their ass fat during the course of the study, presumably right around the time the scientists told them they qualified for participation in an ass fat study. The subjects who lost fat around their butt during the study were actually more likely to have a heart attack, marking the first and last time that taking medical advice from Sir Mix-a-Lot saved someone's life.

Sir Mix-a-Lot 1, Cosmo 0.

One of the reasons for fat's unexpected healing powers is that dangerous acids tend to build up in fatty tissue, instead of loitering inside your liver or heart. And in case you're wondering, having toxic acids inside your buttocks is significantly better than having them in your heart valves. It's pretty much like having an angry chipmunk bite your ass versus the same chipmunk biting your heart.